Sassy First Drafts: Pilot

So I have this idea. I tend to have a really hard time starting papers, probably because the academic tone is just boring and makes me want to peel my eyes out. So to alleviate some of the stress of just starting out with an academic voice and creating something coherent, I’m going to write the first drafts the way I might tell someone about the subject matter when I’ve had too much caffeine. I did something like this for the introduction to a lit paper I was struggling with my freshman year, where I started out sounding like a pompous asshole, and then just toned it down slightly. My professor ate it up.

Original:

As aspiring academics in the vicious world of English literature, it is important to have a full arsenal of strategies to promote your superior and irrefutable opinions on any piece of high art that dare cross your path. It takes years to develop a sophisticated armory of derailing devices and callous claims to truth, but if you start with the proper repertoire of tactics, you are well on your way to dominating the world of literary criticism and all the pompous bastards that dwell within. I aim to illustrate the strategies I used to respond to the poem “I Think I Should Have Loved You Presently” and their effectiveness in formulating a coherent essay.

Edited:

As an amateur literary critic, it is important to have a set of methods to argue your views on a variety of types of literature. It is also important for you to develop a sophisticated understanding of your writing process so that you may hone your skills further and develop as a writer. There are several strategies available to you both in actively writing and in reflecting upon it and editing, though not all of which will work best for every writer. In this exercise I responded twice to the same poem, the first response being a purely emotional one, and the second being an academic free write. I aim to illustrate the strategies I used to respond to the poem “I Think I Should Have Loved You Presently” by Edna St. Vincent Millay and their effectiveness in formulating a coherent essay.

So for this mini-project I’ll just post a few paragraphs every now and then. It’s also a (hopefully) amusing method for the self-serving goal of keeping myself on track. I pulled a few all-nighters writing research papers at the end of last semester, and I don’t think I have any bigger academic regrets than trying to pass off one of them as an acceptable piece of scholarship. I’m hoping this will help. I’m already excited to start one, actually, except that I don’t have enough research. *frolics to the library*

And feel free to join me! I think there might be a potential for some really hilarious material

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